I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
