go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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