I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
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