I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
