There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
