we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
