She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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