Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
