once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
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the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
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Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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