I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
