No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
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