just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize
