is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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