I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
He better not be in your backpack
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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