he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize