That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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