I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize