I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
