Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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