Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
