Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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