I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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