Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
