Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
