found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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