I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
