Who did Billy Mays play for?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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