Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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