i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
