it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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