is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
That was before I lit my hair on fire
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
