She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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