so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
