Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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