....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
