When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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