u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
what is it with giant penises always finding me
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
