Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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