Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
