She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I am naked and annoyed.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
