i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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