sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
