A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
