thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize