Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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