I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
