Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Randomize
