Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
