Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Randomize
