so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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