and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
